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J . D . C a s t e n : 1 9 6 8 - P r e s e n t
bathroom. Mother's sexuality a curiosity store may have been food for his junkie 1968 Born "John David Coleman" at 3:01 1973 Mother remarries, and I now have a 1975 Back in Vida, OR., I wait for the Jewish ("Casten") dad, and a Celtic school bus by an old braying donkey. I ("Inskeep") mother. The wedding is advertised on the radio, and there is a huge celebration at a community hall. We fly to Los Angeles and stay at the Mayfair hotel: I have a closet for a room, and I get fabric scraps and egg-flour glue for Christmas. We have fun flying paper airplanes out of the windows several I swiped some LSD from a friend of my stories up, watching one go into a cab car. 1976 Now in Aloha, Oregon, I'm doing mother; was taken to Sacred Heart We move to a house in El Segundo, and better at school, and I begin to make some Hospital, but was not treated. Learned watch an airplane land without landing- good friends. I start to read, take up my colors and toilet trained: remembered hobbies, and like creative toys and my "big golden dream" as if it were a huge drawing. We neighbor kids get in trouble landmark, like watching the stationary 1974 We move to a run-down flat in by convincing one of our group to try a pil Syracuse New York, witness the blizzards we found. Luckily, nothing happened. The and thunderstorms, violent gangs, a early confusion of youth begins to settle flooded park which people traverse with down into habit, routine, ritual. The Radha/Krishna ashram for two weeks. My canoes, a flooded basement which turns Portland Trail Blazers win the NBA off the heat (landlord was sued), and my championship. My sister has open-heart newborn sister, who was born with a hole surgery, heart-failure, almost dies, and in her heart, catches pneumonia. We recovers for a long time at Dornbecker Move to a high-rise building, and one day Hospital: I enjoy the company of the other after school, my parents have moved, and kids, especially one with huge hands, who I a neighbor puts me on a bus that goes push around the ward in a cart. I myself through a couple of states on its way to end up going to the hospital one day, the Bronx. The Bronx grade school is a when I daydreamingly ride my bike into a fortress, with TV-dinner lunches, and not house. This sort of thing has happened as many lessons as in Syracuse. I ride in before (telephone pole, parked car). Some my Uncle Joel's cab around NYC (I did not friends and I win the school's newspaper 1972 Vida, OR. Sordid yet innocent sexual know at the time that Uncle Joel had recycling drive. We eat pizza with the experimentation with neighbor kids in the robbed a bank, or that stops by the candy winnings. My dad studies Television at a J . D . C a s t e n : 1 9 6 8 - P r e s e n t
PCC, and I get a look behind the camera, badge of shame, especially with the girls I but enjoyed most of my interests that I especially when he gets a job as camera began to really notice. Certain people man for the Blazers. By this time, he and were just to be avoided, some where to be longed for. I got into pretending to be a 1983 Moving back to Eugene, I was spy, James Bond like, with a friend, and we delighted to have my first computer game 1979 Mom, sister, and I move to an old both got into Micronauts. We picked up a accepted to be published. Having few trailer at Agate Beach, Oregon. I love the piece of opened candy off a store floor friends, and some luck already, I dedicated stormy beach, and explore a graveyard by once, and were eventually trailed and myself to programming, to some measure the lighthouse with friends. I get my own confronted a few blocks away by a of success. My Sophomore and Junior manager. We lied, and said we got the years I met two good friends, my best candy elsewhere. I began to use TRS-80 friend, who had a job and a car, and a girl computers at school, where I got an award who took a fancy to me. I began to get mostly A's in school, Lettered in Soccer, screwdriver solution to the Rubik's Cube in went to Boys' State, but never seemed to a Scientific American, I found an succeed matching up the girl(s) I liked with advertisement for a Sinclair computer-- I the girls that liked me. I began to listen to ordered one, but soon after I got it in the new wave music, and went to a disco on mail, my family moved to Bend, Oregon, comic books. Another friend and I skate- for the drier air that would help my sisters clubbing girls with acne could be a little board on ramps, and steal some dope from disappointing. Drive-In B-movies were a his surfer brothers. Later, I get greedy and blast-- but never had enough sex in them overdose on a huge batch of liberty-caps: 1981 In Bend I began to play Dungeons fish-eye tears, and emotional turmoil as I and Dragons, programmed various games listen to Jean Michel Jarre's Oxygene on on my little computer, and hung out with 1986 Failing to enter Stanford (I blamed it friends-- riding bikes, getting in snow-ball on a teacher of mine who forgot to submit fights, and discussing all sorts of personal supposed to fil out for me), I entered the Science advisor was unimpressed with my claims to computer knowledge, and I drifted towards the journalism route. Parties were an obsession, and joining a fraternity became a natural consequence. I met many friends there, and was re- bone was broken. My black eye was a started High School, was a bit of a nerd, J . D . C a s t e n : 1 9 6 8 - P r e s e n t
first word I saw: "Brahma." I began to take acquaintance who first hinted that she 1991 1990-1991 was my year to live alone, was in love with someone else and it and I loved it. I really enjoyed my privacy, subsequently became clear that I was not 1988 My second year in col ege, I re- although I visited friends often-- it was a discovered the humanities, and fel in love time for monkish experiments of the mind. at first sight in a metaphysics class. Alas, I was really getting into being me, and I that relationship was to remain in my was ready to have a serious romantic imagination. I began to feel my way into relationship. I fel in love again, and the English and Philosophy, especially poetry, clues were everywhere that this was going existentialism, and critical thinking in to happen. For the next ten years, it never did. I began to feel as if I were watched all the time, and that people were giving me didn't seem to mind, and I did get the 1989 I made a couple of cassette tape clues through double-talk, innuendoes, music col age's and hid them with some and hints, about a promising future of love comprehensive military entrance exam. poetry in locations for my dream girl to and money; both of which I'd sort of given Boot camp was no written exam. It find, to no avail. After a heavy acid trip up on for a time, to be that celibate monk pushed me deep, sick inside myself, as I and a dose of Nietzsche and Joyce in the artist poet-- which I felt content with. I tried to maintain a low inconspicuous summer after my 3rd year in col ege, I began to talk to a wall-hanging that I profile there: my body could barely take it, wrote "Humbled Beyond a Word"-- a poem suspected was tapping back signals to me. and my mind just fol owed my body. I that was to haunt me with paranoia for One for yes, two for no, three for I love learned much about my body, mind, the sometime afterwards. I saw her for the you, etc. But the communication was military, and institutions in general: it was last time, and didn't even know it. never clear enough to prove something in an "accomplishment" that one would not want to have ahead of one-- exploding 1990 I tried my hand at some water-color grenades, crawling under machine gunfire, painting early in 1990, and came up with 1992 I moved back in with some friends, what I was later to call the Last Icon. I had and rotated roommates for the next sex for the last time that January, and couple of years while I completed my M.A. have been celibate ever since. Reality was in Philosophy; all the time, being watched, replaced by an active imagination, and and talking to the wall, and never knowing many love interests of the mind. Poetry if I had already slipped out of sanity. I got had found me, shy, dreamy, intense, and into postmodernism backwards, studying crafty. I began to take myself as an artist it from the vantage point of the history of seriously (not that anyone else really did-- philosophy. This proved to be just my cup sun of my consciousness: I opened a but my poetry has had an emotional of tea intel ectually, and my years of dictionary at random and pointed to the impact on my friends). It was all about computer programming, and consequent possibilities of potential talent fulfilled. interest in Artificial Intelligence J . D . C a s t e n : 1 9 6 8 - P r e s e n t
charity, and then diverting money away constant assault, but this time offering a deconstruction quite wel -- I had an from what they perceived as bad politics. intel ectual angle to pursue. Since the Arguments boiling out of arguments, and 1988 "Brahma" incident, I had all this time me beating myself black and blue-- with a been taking notes for a grand poem: Post- 1996 After actually taking the medications 1994 What I began to suspect in 1993 for almost a year (and medications for became my reality at the start of 1994: the medication side effects), the chemical cameras turned into microphone/speakers lobotomy sneaked me off into a near and moved strait into my head. I was emotionless coma for the next seven years: 2005 Undergo Repetitive Transcranial engaged with the observer(s) strait from a time of routine, dry mouth, constipation, Magnetic Stimulation (my experimental the mind now, every waking hour-- even a anxiety, worry, dread, phobias, and "study" at Yale), and it helps quite a bit. movie starlet was communicating with my paranoia that the public was hip to my mind. Paranoia pointed to a logic work and talking about it everywhere professor, and I was arrested in a through innuendo. Eight hours of TV. a Romantic Poets class after punching out of day, and two for reading: I read over two 2007 Balancing a life of madness and the UO via the professor's face. He hundred books on cognitive science, responsibility. Finally publish the book- manipulating the situation-- I'l never forget the way he tried to corner me, with 2000 I begin Meditating 20 minutes a day his head tilted back, sneering at me just and pray nightly. My sister Dies. My before my knuckles made contact. He was mother has terminal liver disease with less an ass enough, that he deserved that than years to live. My sister's six year old upbraiding, even if he wasn't responsible son might someday be my responsibility. I for the voices in my head. Things didn't can barely wipe my own ass right. . more turn out wel . After a stint in the mental health hospital ward in the county jail, I "American Power Projection" and "Melody was tortured in my head and body for years. Ears ringing, bleeding, violated, molested, sexually assaulted, nightmarish emotions, and excruciating repetition of harassment tactics aimed at me by a team of people evidently concerned about somehow raising money by doing this to 2010 Won the crazy argument me-- millions if not billions of dollars for Release "Daymare."

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